Non violence is a weapon for the strong – Mahatma Ghandi
Non violent communication (NVC) is base don the principles of nonviolence – the natural state of compassion when no violence is in the heart.
NVC begins by assuming that we are all compassioante by nature and that violent strategies – whether verbal or physical – are learned behaviours taught and supprted by the prevailing culture. NVC assumes that we all share the same basic human needs, and that each of our actions are a strategy to meet one of more of those needs.
People who practice NVC have found greater authenticity in the communication, increased understanding , deepening connection and conflict resolution.
(Further reading: Non-violent Communication by Marshall B Rosenberg)
We are made in the image of God > compare Christian creations story with others. We are created in the image of a Creator. This has been co-opted by empire – trying to sell clothes, make up, some ideal image – they are trying to sell something I already have. The world and earth are alive and creating always. There is a scientific link between art/creativity and healing… when you are writing a story, cooking, drawing, gardening… we are not functioning out of the survival part of our brain. Importance isn’t what is made but the process of creating.
MANDALAS
The Mandala (Sanskrit for circle or completion has a long history of being recognised for a deep spiritual meaning and representation of wholeness.
The very nature of creating a mandala is therapeutic and symbolic. The shapes and colours you create in your mandala will reflect your inner self at the time of creation. Your instinct and feeling should inspire and guide you through the process of creation. Ultimately, you will be creating a portrait of yourself as you are when creating the mandala. So whatever you are feeling at the time, whatever emotions are coming through, will be represented in your mandala.
So then, how shall we live?
Practices and principles for compassionate, non-violent communication
Proposition: We are made in the image of God, therefore if I am careful and I am creative, exploring who you are and revealing who I am can be an act of worship (our communication)
First issue is realising our reaction to what we perceive as agression or conflict… this is not right or wrong this is just how we are made:
- fight or flight
- non-verbal agression
- tone and inflection
Colossians 1:18-20
He was supreme in the beginning and – leading the resurrection parade – he is spreme in the end. From beginning t end he’s there, towering far above everything, everyone. So spacious is he, so roomy, that everything of God finds its proper place in him without crowding. Not only that, but all the broken and dislocated pieces of the universe – people and things, animals and atoms – get properly fixed and fit together in vibrant harmonies, all because of his death, his blood that poured down from the cross.
Basic technique:
- Observe (without judgement)
- Share our feelings
- Sharing what needs, values or desires have created our feelings
- Requesting (a concrete action we are requesting to enrich our humanity)
Stumbling blocks: judgements, comparisons, denial of responsibility, demanding.
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